But does anyone really care?

I was away for the weekend of course ; It was an international break, so the wife knows she can schedule something in. I missed the England match and all of the reaction on Saturday, etc so the first I heard was a radio report saying ‘Rooney may not travel to Switzerland following newspaper allegations about his private life’ – Deep down I knew what all that would be about, but was it wrong to secretly hope that he was caught giving another bloke a mouth party? Or maybe even coming out as a raging homosexual? At least that would be a bit different to the normal ‘Sex Hooker shame’ Yawn. The only vaguely interesting part is that Rooney, multi millionaire professional footballer with England and Manchester United, the biggest club in the world, had to PAY for his extra legover. Ha! You may be rich, but you still look like a squashed tomato.

One more England match to endure, but it has been cunningly scheduled up against the next England Cricket 20/20 match, so I know which one I will be watching. Watching the England football team on TV is too noisy in my house anyway, as the dog barks aggressively at the screen every time he sees Rooney, Terry, Lampard, Defoe, Lennon, Gerrard. When Cashley comes on screen, he simply leans over and licks his own arsehole.

I do hope I get no complaints about the title of today’s blog, and that we don’t get people coming to the clockenders site, hoping to catch a sneaky pic of Rooney’s little fella – I wouldn’t want to misrepresent things, but as we all know how Arsenal fans have such a legendary sense of humour!

Bolton on Saturday seems a long way off, but I will give the Rocket a plug anyway – The Away Boys are playing both before and after the match, so get down there for a few pre and post match pints and the usual craic. My feelings towards Bolton have slightly mellowed since the Allardyce days ; Megson was a moany old cunt, but Owen Coyle seems like a nice enough chap, and one who respects our manager. Now we just have to abuse that dirty wankbag Kevin ‘Elbows’ Davies. Come on Tommy V, get in there and give him a taste of his own medicine. It would be an interesting education for Koscielny or Squillaci, perhaps one of them will pick up a mystery knock in training this week ; I really hope not, they should be desperate to play and test themselves against a big , dirty old cunt like Davies.

Come on you Reds

Some idiots got the hump with my title yesterday. Do I give a shite? No!! The subject did go along with the title anyway you mugs, now get a life.

I was woken in a text from a North Western gooner mate saying Rooney had been up to his old tricks. I just hoped it was not with my Nan. NOTWrecon he has been doing a £1.2k a night hooker who is not to bad for Shrek to be fair. I am sure I could do better but I do not look like a green cartoon character. No wonder he was so shite in South Africa. Do you recon old red face will be happy with his star player? Crapello has already told the fat green look-a-like to do one for this weeks qualifier.

We could also be in for Kievs 17 year old keeper – FFS – what about now? Lukichas been dug up from his Yorkshire farm to say we should have signed Reina, Valdes, or Julio Cesar – No shit!!

As for the Mail’s crap way to try and stir it with Cesc – Fuck you Daily Mail. All the press are just gutted they didn’t get that big story they all wanted and our captain stays to fight on for The Arsenal!!

Francewere embarrassed again by Belarus. Ooops. Andrey put in an assist for Russia so that should save him suggesting he should be stripped of the captaincy again. I can not believe Cesc has got to go to Argentina on Tuesday. Another match off for him against Boltan I recon. Ridiculous.

To end It was sad to see Flawson get injured for Engerlund, missing all the champions league ties, oh dear. How does it feel? That is just a starter if they get anywhere near to injures we suffer they will be pointless and pot-less by Xmas.

Up the Gooners, I hope the cook tries hard to impress shitsleeves tomorrow, we do not want to bore him too much he may stop reading.

I have logged on to the web for the first time since Wednesday morning expecting to see the headline “Arsene signs World Class keeper on the quiet”………….. No. Oh well, Almunia it is. Lets hope for a blunder-less season.

I managed to watch the Engerlund game last night. Nice new shit kit. Horrible shorts. Theo did farely well. He had more of an impact as the first half wore on and at the start of the second half.

While I have been away Arsenal announced their league squad for the season;

Homegrown players
Nicklas Bendtner
Gael Clichy
Denilson
Johan Djourou
Cesc Fabregas
Vito Mannone
Alex Song

Non-homegrown players:
Manuel Almunia
Andrey Arshavin
Marouane Chamakh
Abou Diaby
Emmanuel Eboue
Lukasz Fabianski
Laurent Koscielny
Samir Nasri
Tomas Rosicky
Bacary Sagna
Robin van Persie
Thomas Vermaelen
Sebastien Squillaci

Which leaves room for 5 more senior players to come in…….. 4 of which can be foreign…….. hint hint for January.

Other players who can be used in the league are;

Benik Afobe
Chuks Aneke
Nacer Barazite
Kyle Bartley
Francis Coquelin
Craig Eastmond
Jay Emmanuel-Thomas
Emmanuel Frimpong
Kieran Gibbs
Conor Henderson
Gavin Hoyte
Henri Lansbury
Havard Nordtveit
Aaron Ramsey
Mark Randall
Wojciech Szczesny
Armand Traore
Carlos Vela
Theo Walcott
Sanchez Watt
Jack Wilshere

These are our Under 21s.

I see the scummers are charging us £38 for tickets for the game at their shit hole. Wow that is a big fee to see our yoof team. Come on you Gooners lets show them how football is played.

Chamakh was knackered after preseason, obviously they ease themselves in, in France meanwhile Arshavin*is gunner turn it of for us, start with smashing up Boltan for me son. We could do with a repeat of Blackpool.

Enough of me boring you hey Shitsleeves!!

After waiting all summer for the World Cup to close to an end,only three games in to the real football again and yeah it’s that time again………internationals!!!!!

C’mon for fuck sake,can we not just have a bit of*domestic for a while………….oh yeah just for the record i mean domestic football,not beating shit out of the missus,i had all summer doing that.

It’s been a long time since i blogged due to the World Cup being on etc. *I would like to say i hope you all enjoyed it but i very much doubt that,so i won’t ask*either way. Personally i can honestly say i watched about 90 mins max all in.

No it’s not because Scotland weren’t there,we never fecking are and we won’t be at the euro’s either.It’s just international football*does not appeal to me at all.

What is frustrating though is that Crapello dropped Theo like a hot fucking tattie for the World Cup,slating him for not being disciplined and playing where he’s told but the wankers called him back in now after a* good start to the season.

On the Theo note i am delighted for him and the start he’s had to the season,though before i get way ahead of myself i still feel he has it all to do,but believe this could be his year as well as Arsenal’s.

I feel the team in general is looking the part and the new boys are settling in well,especially our new keeper we bought………oh what’s his name again?????????? Looking forward to seeing Scquillaci in action also.

It is frustrating we never pulled out all the stops for a keeper but we must put our faith in Almunia and hope that the fact Le Boss never brought in anyone in shows he does trust him and he will*want to prove to him as well as the fans that he is a good keeper,because on his day he is.

Then on the other hand it’s not like the situation at City where Hart makes a cock up and Given will be in like a rat up a drainpipe.

Almunia makes a cock up and Wenger get’s him in and says right thats it your dropped and Flapianski is in……..could you imagine Almunia trying to keep a straight face????

At the end of the day,we have had*a good start to the season – draw at Anfield,i think we all would have taken that for first game,no Cesc or RVP. Blackpool took a good hiding,though with all due respect it was expected,though the football we played was fucking awesome and Theo got a massive lift!!!!

Blackburn away – well we all know how it goes against that fat fucks sides,so *to take all three points was a relief. In days gone by we would be struggling after going a goal down and chasing a draw,where as last week we went ahead,they equalised,again the heads could have went down but we ground out a good result and win,plus we won’t have to face that fat fuckers team away again this season,unless it in the cup!!!!!

So after the internationals it is Bolton at home who have a* boss*i think has the quality to be a top manager and likes to play football how it should be, so i’m looking forward to a good game with another 3 points in the bag the main thing.

So as always let’s get right*behind the team and please,please,please keep the faith,no matter what!!!!!!

Finally before i go i wanted to let Block19er know that Rabbi has got his new shirt with Walcott* 14* on the back!!!!!!!

As always best wishes from all at Arsenal Scotland!!!!

But Sky Sports News did the best to hype it up, didn’t they? And all in HIGH DEFINITION ; did they mention that?

*I love the use of fax machines on deadline day ; what the fuck is that about? Stuck in the 1980’s or what? Maybe they should go back even further, and reintroduce telegrams

Fulham, Arsenal want your goalkeeper STOP

*Arsenal will pay 2 million pounds STOP

*Need to replace Almunia, as the ball, he cannot STOP

*Or maybe we should just drag them into the 21^st century and just text bids to each other ;

*Arsene :* Alrite m8, how much u want 4 Schwz? LOL

*Hughes : FU

*Arsene : OK m8 c u l8er, PMSL

*I*knew we were never gonna sign a keeper, it was all too good to be true, what else were we gonna moan about then? Bloody hell, the next time Almunia shows even a hint of a mistake that leads to a goal, the keyboard warriors are gonna be out in force demanding Wenger be sacked. There’s nothing we can do now but get behind Almunia and hope he doesn’t get too exposed in the next few games while the furore dies down.*

I am genuinely terrified of going to White Hart Lane in the Carling Cup with Fabianski in goal though – Bloody hell, just thinking about it gives me a turtles head, Bergkamp only knows what I am gonna do on the night if his name is announced on the tannoy as I walk past the welcoming committee by the Corner Pin.

That is a few weeks away yet though, and we have to get through this interminable international break first, and all the normal Capello bashing. Just get over it, Fleet Street, he ain’t gonna get sacked, so stop trying your best to get him on the dole.

We have some winnable fixtures after that, so lets get some motherfuckin points on the board, just so every can calm the fuck down. Almunia is our number one ; deal with it already.

I can see us going on a decent run for a few weeks, until we have to face the forces of darkness over at Stamford Bridge. That game will tell us a lot about the season we can expect. Our 100% record against the top two from last season is under threat ; 100% losing record of course. That is a big, big game for Almunia.

I just can’t believe deadline day came and went and Arsenal didn’t dip their toes in. FFS Birmingham were more active this summer.

We’ve done the minimum required and replaced has-been Gallas and has-been Sylvestre. We all felt sure a keeper was coming in. Even Schwarzer would have done but we’re stuck with Almunia, who is drained of self belief, and Flapianski, who is, well shit!

I just think it sets us up for a repeat of last season. Lots of promise, some great performances, but just short of what is needed. The worst thing is, we are so close to being a top side, but just that, we are only close.

As it turns out current Arsenal keepers had a great day. None better than Islington born James Shea who trained with the England squad. Crapello was so short of numbers he had to give the young gun a shout over at Shenley.

So that’s it, a shit boring window, no amazing headlines, it’s time to just crack on with what we’ve got. I imagine the players, outfield, feel as bummed out as we do.

Time to get behind Almunia and pray he finds some form, some confidence, and some match winning saves.

One of the most disturbing aspects of the first half on Saturday, was that every time the camera went onto Allardyce, he was shown stuffing his big fat face, cramming as many pie crusts and slices of fried bacon down there that he could. You fat fuck.

The match started with plenty of time being wasted on throws and free kicks in their own half – I was watching the clock closely, and up to thirty seconds were wasted on each one. Robinson had to spot and respot the ball, despite it being in his own half, and then Pedersen was dicking around with that towel. It’s a shame Jack didn’t put that chance away near the end, as we would then have the chance to take the piss and use the towel for our own throw ins – The home crowds reaction would have been interesting. Speaking of the home crowd, singing ‘Same Old Arsenal always cheating’ was rather ironic when their own players were throwing themselves to the floor in the box as the clock ticked down. They also wheeled out the infamous Wenger song, just to ram home what a bunch of braindead cunts they are. Jokes on them ; They have to live in Blackburn. Ha!

I thought we defended well, the only blip being the goal conceded of course – I thought Koscielny made a mistake by trying to win the ball from Diouf (the spitting one), instead of just keeping pace and shepherding towards the corner – Instead he committed to the tackle and lost his man and the ball. Credit to Almunia and the two full backs, in fact the whole team played well. In fact, the only thing that made me* nervous was the Arsenal fans doing ‘OLE’s at only 2-1 in front. Aye Carumba, will we never learn? That will bite us on the arse later in the season, I guarantee it.

After the high point of the Blackpool game, Theo continued his good form with another good performance. Theo rarely scores two games in a row, I don’t know what it is – he just doesn’t seem to go on those scoring streaks like other forward players. Hopefully this is the start of a good run for him.

Walcott’s finishing does actually remind me of another AFC legend and Invincible. I used to call Ljungberg ‘One touch Freddie’, as he only seemed to score when he only had time for one touch past the keeper – If he was clean through with loads of time, he inevitably bollocksed it up. This afflicted him for the first two or three seasons, until he finally sorted it out and became one of the best finishers to wear the red n white. I suggest Theo checks out a few DVD’s.

So, the Spurs have finally reached the Champions League ; well, whoop de do ; where the hell have you been for the last thirteen seasons? Following on from their result against Wigan on Saturday, I be Inter Milan are shitting themselves!

One again our group stage draw has turned out to be, well…………rather boring. Football wise is should be easy enough, but long trips to Donetsk and Belgrade are a pain in the ass. At least we get to welcome back Eduardo, and give him the proper send off he deserves – Arsenal fans can show their class once more, I love the way we do that.

I was hoping for a bit more excitement in the draw, but let’s be honest, if we had drawn Real Madrid out of Pot two. It would just give Sky Sports and the papers the opportunity for another Jose Mourinho wankfest. Yawn, get over him already, he left England three years ago. Plus he is a complete cuntbag.

Squillaci has finally signed, and just to confirm, I am aware that this player is not the same ‘Toto Schillachi’ who starred for the host country at Italia ’90. That was what is known as a JOKE – thanks to all the comments on last weeks blog setting me straight. And who said Arsenal fans have no sense of humour?? Let’s hope Squillaci is a real tough bastard. He missed Blackburn, so hopefully has time to settle in before the Bolton match, due to the bloody international break. We wait all summer for the real stuff to start again, and then we get a break after we have played the grand total of three games! Aye Carumba! So now we will spend the next ten days listening to all the injury reports and our players return to London Colney in various states of disrepair. RvP has cunningly cut out the middle man by getting crocked in the Red n White this time – must be a new club policy.

Shove your international break up your arse. Wake me up in two weeks.

I’m still basking in the glory of a good win yesterday and wigan winning in scum land. You just can’t beat days like that. It also helped the team i run grabbed 6. Not a bad Saturday at all. Now we hit the international break. Boredom would be setting in but this year I’ve got a well timed trip to Italy to kill the hole in the schedule.

Biggest laugh of the day goes to Man Citeh, all their billions, all their players, and still they can’t do it in an away match. Not even Joe Hart could pull off the magic as Bent slotted home a penalty in the 95th minute!! I can’t wait to see the agro their squad decision causes. It can only further harm moral. Do you recon they are already saying “we’ll be ready for next season”?

After yesterdays match Wenger talked up our title challenge and commended Theo on another good performance. Fatadyce and Twat Pulis put in their two pence worth on Le Boss’ comments from Thursday. Do you think he gives a shit lads? Games over, 3 points in the bag, job done. Two managers also wound up, even better job done, One Arsene Wenger!!

According to Mark Hughes, Schwarzer will move to Arsenal if Fulham can sign a new number 1, namely Shay Given. To me Fulham get the better deal there but I know Citeh would not sell Given to us. It has got to the stage now, 3 days before the window shuts, I just want a keeper. Any keeper. Schwarzer will have to do.

It looks like young (not so young now) Traore will leave the club. None of us are surprised. The Mirror say it’s West Ham but I hear it’s more likely to be Juventus.

Watch out in the next few days for the shit to be stirred around Jack Wilshere after a bust up in a club. Nothing worse than we see on nights out all over the country. Wilshere’s presence means everything will be taken out of proportion and everyone’s side of the story, other than Jacks will be heard, one for the media circus to speculate on hey??

More tomorrow…………

The view from my sofa was beautiful. This has been the most enjoyable victory since we beat Porto 5-nil in early March.

I absolutely hate Blackburn and I absolutely hate Sam Alladyce so seeing them squirm is just Le Magic.

The game started pretty well. Arsenal delt with what was hurled at them, Almunia had no problem, Koscielny had a few hick ups, but we were pretty comfortable. At the other end the forward line looked dangerous, RVP was back for sure, and Theo was making them nervous. Diaby was also having a stormer.

Then it all clicked into place 20 minutes in, RVP threaded the ball and Theo ran on to smash it home. A glorious goal and I wonder what Mr. Hansen will think, he had time to think, and he still crunched it in. You win nothing with kids.

But a lapse at the back let Blackburn equalise. It was shocking on the right for Koscielny, bad positioning, weak to hold the attacker off. In the middle, it was a tap in, even though two men where around him. Arsenal will need to sighten up for sure.

RVP then went off after going in for a fifty-fifty. His ankle came off worse. Hopefully he’ll just though miss the international break and be ready for Boltan.

Arsenal dominated the second half and the nerves were settled just five minutes in. Nob Andy Gray was just saying what a bad season Arshavin was having (2 and half games in!!). Sagna rolled it across to Cesc who shot was deflected onto Arshavin’s right foot. Bang. 2-1 to The Arsenal.

Arsenal kept the ball well and had no problems as the game wore on. It should have been more especially when Wilshere met the ball at the far post. It felt great to get the win. Well played lads. On with the show.

Arsenal: Almunia, Sagna, Clichy, Vermaelen, Koscielny, Song, Cesc (Rosicky 68), Diaby, RVP (Chamakh 38), Theo, Arshavin (Wilshere 83). Subs not used: Flapianski, Eboue, Gibbs, Vela.

Goals: Walcott 20, Arshavin 51.

Att: 25,059.

Mickael Landreau
Age: 31
GK
Lille

The Mail have us in for French stopper Mickey Landreau. The international keeper with european experience would make an ideal number 1 for me.

Welcome to the new Sylvestre, number 18, Sebastien Squillaci, we he can’t be any friggin’ worse can he?

He’s won league titles, has international, and champions league experience. He’s a tall bastad and I think he’s a good asset to have. He fully fits the bill for what we were looking for. No news on a keeper or a dirty centre midfielder but is it just me dreaming that, that is going to happen by 5pm Tuesday, probably.

According to Le Boss I am well and truly dreaming. Le Boss has said he doesn’t think we will sign anyone else. Lets just hope he’s bluffing. We need a keeper to at least take Almunia out of the firing line for the time being.

The papers are saying Stekelenburg has turned us down. He felt a £10 earn as you play deal was not for him even if he could have Rob the Chef cook him any steak any size on a Monday at training. The club may now turn their attentions to Mickael Landreau if a move for Schwarzer fails. I’d take Landreau over Schwarzer whatever the price.

The link to Ryan Bennett is unliekly for me at 20 he would be part of the first team squad but would not play following the capture of Squillaci. At £2.5Mil he’s hardly a bargain.

So Blackburn tomorrow, even with RVP coming back in surely Theo has to start. The lad is a confidence player and needs to carry on while he’s doing well. You can’t drop a player after a top performance. I’d rather see Arshavin on the bench, bit of a rest for him, and get Theo running at Samba and Nelson. Blackburn are a decent home team, they will get stuck in and make it physical, they will play it aerial. Arsenal just need to get it down and work hard.

The starting line up should be Almunia, Sagna, Koscielny, Vermaelen, Clichy, Song, Cesc, Diaby, RVP, Walcott, and Chamakh. With Rosicky and Arshavin to make an impact from the bench if needed. Denilson and Vela should also warm the bench alongside EBOUE, EBOUE, we like EBOUE!!

I’m an armchair fan, looking forward to a lazy morning, nice big breakfast and the lads in HD, come on you GOONERS!!

Arsenal kick off against the Arsenalista’s in the Champions League this season. Braga, nicknamed Arsenalista’s after their gooner like kit, come to Ashburton Grove followed by a trip to Partizan in Belgrade. It’s tough double header then against Donetsk that will probably decide out fate in the group.

The group does not throw us up a tough game, all the teams are beatable, but the travelling to Belgrade and Donetsk could prove a problem. Maybe not to our Champions League campaign but more likely to the games against Chel$ki away and Newcastle at home. The saving grace is we go to Belgrade on a Tuesday and the Chel$ki away game is not till 4pm on the Sunday. Braga also knocked Sevilla out in the qualifiers, with or without Squillaci, that’s not a bad claim to fame.

The other sub plot to the group will be the return to Ashburton Grove of our number 9 Eduardo. It will be a great atmosphere on the night of 19th October as we welcome him home. Let just hope he doesn’t take a tumble in the box.

Away from the UCL, Le Boss has said Nasri and Bendy will be back in three to four weeks. Djourou is not fit to start against Blackburn but Cesc and RVP and ready to rock and roll. There is nothing I’d like more than to smash Blackburn and send the Walrus to run off and lick his wounds.

Le Boss also had a dig at Stoke and I’m sure he is bringing Blackburn into the same bracket. How these shite teams are turning football into Rugby. Love it. How long until Wenger gets accused of being a moaner? Yeah not long, lets wait for Tony Pulis to have his say.

As for our centre back, the new signing, yeah it hasn’t happened yet.

Til tomorrow Gooners.

So the dirty scum bags, have made it the ECL. The scum got lucky with what must have been the easiest ever route via the qualifiers. Young Boys just enjoyed being entertained by the scum bags. I thought it went a bit far the putting Garry Glitter on in the players bar.

As for the game, er, to quote the bbc, a classy defoe strike, how fucking typical? The guy blatantly hand balled it, he admited so too, I touched my arm but they all count, er no you’re a cheat. Why can other teams seems to get away with it? You can’t have double standards, if you want to vilify TH14 then you have to do the same to all. Perhaps Young Boys should pull out of the Europa Cup?

So it’s straight into the draw at tea time today. So you know the score, Pot 1 v Pot 2 v Pot 3 v Pot 4 but you can’t play your own country.

Pot 1

Inter, Farcelona, ManUre, Chel$ki, The Arsenal, Bayern, AC, Lyon.

Pot 2

Weder, Real, Roma, Shaktar, Benfica, Valencia, Marseille, Panathinaikos.

Pot 3

Scum, Rangers, Ajax, Shalke, Basel, Braga, Copenhagen, Sparta Moscow.

Pot 4

Hapoel Tel-Aviv, Twente, Rubin Kazan, Auxerre, Cluj, Partizan, Zilina, Bursaspor.

So The Arsenal will be looking for, Panathinaikos, Copenhagen, and I’m not sure, it’s a bit of a lottery I suppose Cluj, at least we know a bit about them, even though they drew at Slumford Bridge in 08/09. If not Twente for the trip and the fact they are weaker this season. For the scum we’d take Inter, Weder, and Auxerre. I’d have stuck Real Madrid in there but do we really want them having fun in Madrid? NO! I’d rather us have them.

On the centre back hunt, Stephen Taylor is available. Squillaci still hasn’t arrived which is bizare. Other than that the only other name seriously linked still is Michael Ciani. It’s desperate times. Not as deserpate as it is for Weder Bremen who might sign Sylvestre, B’ Jesus, scrap that we don’t want the scum playing him they might actually score. As for the keeper, August 31st, who will it be? Anyone got funds to buy a football club, lower leagues, snap up Akinbiyi and Aliadiere and win the league.

More tomorrow gooners.